


The First and The Last

by Althea_Draxus



Category: Post-TLJ - Fandom, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-07
Updated: 2018-09-07
Packaged: 2019-07-08 02:10:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15920772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Althea_Draxus/pseuds/Althea_Draxus
Summary: Kylo had agreed to meet Rey on the snowy cliffs of a planet the Resistance had claimed as their base. The arrangement was simple: they would fight each other, in place of the First Order clashing with the Resistance at the risk of an all-out galactic war. As they fought, one of them was winning - but how will it end?





	The First and The Last

The fiery red blade with its unstable glow hissed ominously at her neck. He kept his eyes trained on her face; she met them with a glare of her own. He had her cornered now. 

Her lightsaber lay clattered somewhere. She was definitely strong enough with the Force to summon it and end him off before he could react. He knew that. She had grown much in strength from the last time they met. Perhaps more than the potential power he had first sensed in her. 

And still he kept his gaze, searching her eyes for something. Anything...

Finally, he found it.

Her eyes remain narrowed at him, but the contempt in them dissipated together with the red glow of his lightsaber. He barely broke their eye contact even as he let his dominant hand fall to the side, the grip on his weapon slackening.

_Ben._

She was imploring him, with her hazel eyes and in his mind.

_Ben, please._

The moment she looked up at him with those eyes full of hope, he felt a sharp pain in his chest. Wordlessly, he sheathed his lightsaber, then pulled off the glove on his right hand. He reached out for her with both hands, hesitating however to let them rest anywhere on her skin. Eventually his ungloved hand was guided to rest on the side of her face, encased with the warmth arising from both her palms. 

She had made her choice. It wasn't him. Those tears he found in her eyes weren't for him.

Nevertheless, when he felt her lips on his, he didn't resist. He didn't push her away. His right hand moved to pull her closer, but his left gloved hand remained glued to his side, clenching at times as he fought the urge to hold her with it.

He had wanted this. Hungered for it, even. But somehow, this kiss stung his heart even more than her rejection to stand beside him all those years ago amidst the carnage in the throne room on board the Supremacy. Back then, he was able to translate his pain into rage. He had led his men to Crait, where he had sworn to Luke during their encounter that he would find her and bring an end not only to her, but all of the Jedi. There was never a moment since that he wasn't reminded of her. The scar that trailed down his right cheek was his constant memento of her.

Now while she was distracted in his arms, it would be the perfect chance to slice her down. She had thrown the fight away.  Nothing would have stopped him from activating his lightsaber and put a definitive end to the Jedi line. He could finally affirm himself as the Jedi Killer, and be rid of the conflict that had been haunting him all this time.

After all, she wasn't crying for him.

So why was he letting her cling to him as she sobbed tears of misplaced relief into his chest? Why was his right arm hugging her close, so close he could feel her heartbeat resonating with his? And why was it that the more tightly she held him, the more pained his heart became?

"No."

It was a murmur, but she heard it all the same. She pulled away to stare at him in bewilderment, and he immediately took the chance to place his left hand behind her head. _Just like the first time on Takodana_ , he thought bitterly. And just like when they were on the planet, he caught her easily in a bridal carry. He had taken her with him back then. Things were different now.

He set her down gently to rest against a boulder, brushing off snow as he did so. He knelt there beside her for a while, studying intently every feature on her face. _She looks stubborn even in her sleep_ , he thought as he detached his cloak and wrapped it around her. He reached out a gloved hand to tuck her stray brown locks behind her ear. As he did so, he whispered into it, "Rey, the person who came for you today, the person who loves you, is not that man you chose... How unfortunate for you to love a dead man."

Those words were cruel; he knew that. But he also knew that somehow, she would find some kindness in them. That was just the way she was.

His TIE Silencer was parked not too far away; he should fly out of these lands before the Resistance detected the lone enemy ship (and find out eventually that Rey had created an opening for him to break through the shield.) He moved to leave, but as he glanced once more at her, he hesitated.

For a brief moment, visions flashed before him: the two of them seated side by side on a bench at a portico, looking out at the clear waters of the lake before them. Her hair was loose, except for a section which was braided in with millaflowers. He could smell the fragrance as she rested her head on his shoulder. There was serenity around them: no battles, no politics, no Resistance, no Jedi, no trace of the First Order. It was just the two of them, tucked away far from the rest of the galaxy amidst the woods in the outskirts of Naboo.

It all felt so certain.

_No_ , he told himself. _She made her choice. And you have made yours._

Kylo Ren pressed his lips softly on her forehead, stood up, and left.

_Farewell, Rey._


End file.
